I am an insomniac.
And I don’t think being an insomniac or calling myself one is cool.
I am an insomniac - not by choice.
My Insomnia, however, is not the complete inability to sleep.
I usually feel sleepy at six in the morning.
The earliest I have forced myself to sleep during the past six months is at two a.m. because I had to wake up at five a.m.
The latest I have slept is at eleven a.m. after which I woke up at seven p.m.
You might think it is because I don’t try, but I have!
My vain attempts have included:
- having warm milk (eww!)
- having hot water baths
- reading horribly boring books
- counting sheep, monkeys, kangaroos, elephants – everything!
I have tried to sleep harder than any of you can ever imagine!
I have had struggles with Insomnia which are of historical importance.
My battles with Insomnia have many a times put the monster to sleep.
I have defeated Insomnia umpteen number of times.
Unfortunately, Insomnia has defeated me more.
And, here I am, losing an unfair battle but not accepting defeat, longing for victory – longing for blissful sleep.
I have met and shared similar stories of unsuccessful battles against Insomnia with many other insomniacs at odd times. It feels good to have company when you have nothing to do.
But some day they all leave.
They defeat insomnia, forever – unlike me.
What do I do at night?
I don’t do anything.
I sit around and wait for sleep to arrive.
I sometimes lie down and wait for sleep.
Sometimes I talk to other insomniacs and wait for sleep.
Sometimes I stand and wait for sleep.
Basically, I jus wait for sleep.
Wait, wait, wait……
But last night I was drugged!
I can’t figure out who/what it maybe.
I went to sleep at eleven thirty – p.m. not a.m.!!!
I was typing out a post and talking to a fellow insomniac and the next thing I remember is waking up (without an alarm!!) at 7:20 a.m. for my 8:00 a.m. class - Which I generally never attend.
My questions are – was I drugged?
Or was it the post which put me to sleep?
If it was the post, what was it about?
Can I type it out again tonight?
Can I defeat insomnia again tonight?
Will I be able to defeat Insomnia once and for all in this bloody battle which has been going on for far too long?
Bring it on, Insomnia!
I am going to slit your throat and have your blood on my hands tonight!!!
And oh! It sure is going to feel good!